You Rang????????

Several times in the last week, my days have been interrupted by telephone surveys. A couple of them were election- related. Do I plan to vote? Which candidate do I plan to vote for in a particular race? Not a big deal. Except at least one of the calls came while I was in the shower, meaning I answered the questions while dripping on the bathroom floor. Great timing!

Last night while I was cooking dinner, I received another survey call. It was tempting to refuse since I was busy, but the little guy won me over when he said up front that he wasn't selling anything and that he would not ask for a donation. Nice guy, so I humored him. For awhile...

The conversation went something like this:

Q: Do you have any dogs in your household?
A: Yes.

Q:Do you have any cats in your household?
A: Yes.

Q: How many dogs do you have in your household?
A: 7 (honestly we do - 3 house dogs and 4 rescued dogs outside. The UPS man despises us!)

Q: How many cats do you have in your household?
A: 2

Q: Of the dogs in your household, are there any which are not spayed, neutered, or fixed? (That's actually how he said it. )
A: Yes, but they are confined. (He obviously didn't have a box to check for that one.)

Q: Of the cats in your household, are there any which are not spayed, neutered, or fixed?
A: No.

Q: Of the dogs in your household that are not spayed, neutered, or fixed, are any of them more than 6 months old?
A: Yes, but they are confined. (Still no box to check for that answer.)

And on it went. There were questions about our pet-breeding habits, which I also answered. Then he had the nerve to ask:
"For recording purposes, what are the names of your pets? Please speak slowly."

Say what? You've got to be kidding me! I've been patient with your questions about the procreative habits of my pets, even though you've managed to call in the busiest hour of my day. But there's no way on this earth I am going to s-l-o-w-l-y talk you through the names of my 9 pets. (No I didn't say this, but I did refuse to give him their names.) He tried to make me feel guilty by telling me that if I didn't answer this question, he could not complete the survey. Sorry, dude! That's just too bad!

Oh, and for the record, of our 9 pets, only 2 are not spayed, neutered, or fixed. They are over 6 months old, but neither has ever reproduced and isn't likely to do so until the time is right. Both are carefully confined. We sort of learned from Baby that it just isn't wise to trust a dog in heat. ;)